Many siblings find it challenging to navigate caring for elderly parents. All Home Care Matters explores 4 challenges of siblings working together and shares 5 tips for navigating these complex situations.
As siblings, caring for elderly parents can be a complex and challenging experience that requires committed participation from everyone involved.
Siblings may struggle with different expectations and priorities, balancing caregiving responsibilities with other life demands, financial concerns, and emotional stress.
However, with effort and a focus on compassion, siblings can work together to provide the best possible care for their aging parents while maintaining healthy relationships with each other.
Here, we explore 4 challenges of siblings working together to care for aging parents and share 5 tips for navigating these complex situations.
4 challenges of caregiving with siblings
1. Different expectations
Arguably, the primary challenge of caring for aging parents as siblings is dealing with different expectations or priorities.
More than likely, each sibling will have a different idea of what their parents need, which can lead to disagreements about how to best care for them.
For example, one sibling may believe that their parents should receive round-the-clock care in a nursing home, while another may prefer to provide in-home care themselves.
This can lead to conflicts that are difficult to resolve, especially if siblings have different levels of involvement in the caregiving process.
The National Study of Caregiving found that the majority of caregivers reported low levels of conflict, but a quarter of them experienced intense strife in at least one area of family conflict.
Dealings with family can be especially tricky when involving emotional matters like concern for parents.
2. Finding a balance
Another challenge is balancing the responsibilities of caring for aging parents with other life demands.
Siblings are likely to have different work schedules, family commitments, or other important obligations that make it difficult to commit to a regular caregiving routine.
Oftentimes, this can lead to feelings of guilt or resentment among siblings who feel that they are inadequately supporting their parents.
3. Monetary challenges
Financial concerns can also be a source of tension among siblings.
Caring for aging parents can be expensive, especially if they require professional medical care or in-home assistance.
One sibling may feel that they are shouldering more of the financial burden than others, leading to resentment and frustration.
It is important for siblings to have open and honest conversations about financial responsibilities and to come up with a plan that is fair and equitable for everyone involved.
4. Emotional stress
Emotional stress is another significant challenge for siblings caring for aging parents.
Watching parents age and decline can be a painful and emotional experience.
Siblings may feel overwhelmed by the responsibility of caring for their parents, anxious about their health and well-being, or sad about the loss of their independence.
This emotional stress can lead to conflicts and tension among siblings as they struggle to cope with their own feelings as well as try to support each other.
5 tips for navigating these challenges
1. Focus on communication
Communication is essential for managing the challenges of caring for aging parents as siblings.
Regular and open communication can help siblings to clarify expectations, share concerns, and work together to make decisions about their parents’ care.
Siblings will need to listen to each other and respect each other’s opinions, even when they inevitably disagree.
2. Communicate boundaries
Setting boundaries is another essential for managing the stress that comes with this territory.
Siblings should be clear about their own limitations and communicate them with each other.
This can help to avoid burnout and resentment among siblings who may feel that they are carrying too much of the caregiving load.
3. Share and delegate responsibilities
Sharing and delegating responsibilities can also help to ease the workload of caring for aging parents.
Siblings can work together to identify tasks that each is willing and able to take on, such as scheduling doctor’s appointments, managing finances, or providing transportation.
Delegating tasks can help to ensure that no one sibling is overwhelmed by the caregiving responsibilities, and can also help to foster a sense of shared responsibility and teamwork.
4. Don’t forget self care
Last but certainly not least, it’s important for siblings to remember to also take care of themselves while caring for their aging parents.
This could include setting aside time for hobbies and self-care activities, seeking support from others, or attending professional counseling as needed.
Caring for aging parents can take its toll over time, and it is essential for siblings to prioritize their own well-being in order to be effective caregivers.
5. Update arrangements as needed
As the health and needs of aging parents change, so too will the caregiving responsibilities of siblings.
Staying in frequent communication and reevaluating the caregiving plan as needed helps keep everyone on the same page.
Recommended for you:
- Dealing with Aging Parents and Siblings: 5 Ways to Work Better Together
- 4 Tips to Get Siblings to Help Care for Aging Parents
- Elder Mediation Helps Siblings Resolve Conflicts and Care for Aging Parents
Guest contributor: Whether you’re a caregiver looking to enhance your knowledge and skills or simply seeking to learn more about dementia home care, All Home Care Matters offers a must-listen podcast and YouTube channel. By subscribing to the show, you will gain access to a wealth of information and tips that can help you provide the best possible care for your loved one. Find us on Apple podcasts or on YouTube.
References: Families Caring for an Aging America, Spouse and adult child differences in caregiving burden, Anticipatory Burden in Adult-Child Caregivers: A Concept Analysis
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